The Snow

are we meant to be

as flowers

growing

constantly absorbing

the flow of spirit 

and expessing life

and world

are we meant to die

like flowers

in the snow?

two minutes til midnight

what it must be like

to live the lenthened hours

like this

where every breath

is taken

by a mention

and all the daunting time

locked away inside my mind

a whisper

a picture

a talismen

the timber in the voice

of a soft spoken prayer

late

so late at night

lighting a candle

to mark moments so sacred

and silent

now

i creep into their room

and look upon the faces
of divine and i know

whos life

comes before mine

who's dreams i will live
to see them through

i've found god

i've seen truth

i've made promises

and i've broken them

i am not who i was yesterday

two minutes ago

and there's a comfort to be found
in clarity

we all are divinity
hopelessly trapped in humanity

Soft

 i dream of when i scale the misty mountain who will go to tibet india egypt i dream of temple walls so holy far from thoughts that trap me hold me where i can stand with all my trembling face to face and breathe in the freedom ah, sweet liberation i take my joy in anticipation friend of sacrifice body of stone heart of ice covered by smiles to be polite but your not blind and i understand that all these lies will melt with time and your just playing nice we laugh and we feel sadness drowing in each others madness or maybe its just mine my sweet divine you know your never wrong but hear my songs my words my prayer my escape, yes from sinking into soft despair

Air

see the blind

and be thankful

for sight

hear a sigh

and be thankful

you can listen to sorrow

see the dead

breathe and be thankful

for tomorrow

cause you can only assume

from a moment

that the next will be waiting

so see what is not

all around you

but don't linger

be thankful

for what is...

only you

are there to hold on to

not sanity

a house

or a home

a club

or a tomb

listen

i am the sick sad

devotion

dwindling

and distant

as a midnights prayer

open your eyes

with hope and knowing

to find

only air

I wanted it all

but my all wasn't fair

all your hurting

my despair

how can there be

happy there?

with all our wanting

who can care

and when we let go

i'll just disappear

...

Un nom

Je ne sais jamais

si elle sera ok

vivons-nous

dans une fantaisie

ou le mal est bon

et les bonnes obtenir tous les

la verite est tombee de la nuit

et nous ne prenons pas la chute

qui ou quoi

est cette la douleur

et a quel point

puis-je decider

de donner a cette douleur

un nom

et laisser la joie

commencer

allons-nous gagner

une guerre contre le monde entier

vous pouvez jouer le sauveur

and I'll play the soul...

all

all i 

ever wanted

was just to love 

and be 

loved

in return

Christ

how can you be sad

if there is no you

no i

leave the world to

its wile-less wondering

i move

but i do not

i have found you

my silent center

and everything

everyone

all the flood will follow

we don't know

but we think we do

follow me

i know the way

i carry the light of a soul

untouched by anger

unknown to sores on my bare

heels

as i track the desert

i feel you with me

all of you

the ghosts of a world

and i know what 

has to be done

not for me 

for everyone

the universal secret

spoken

11pm 

feel that

gods eyes

follow your devotion,

bring the revolution

i have the willing nation

all your aithers

will wither

under the thumb of 

the unborn

the point of all 

consciousness expands

and we are destroyed 

to be brought together

:)

I like Shakespeare :)

Et tu, Brute?

angel baby

i look

in her eyes

does she know goodbye

how could she possibly understand

what its like to lose a man

you will

someday

your flesh of mine

fated to wreck it all

with time

but for now

allow

your cherubs face

to smile

and show what little grace

a woman of our name

has to bear

there are no flowers 

tucked in curls

here little girl

you reflect your mothers

tears

 its my greatest fear

you understand

that you knew

as you grew inside

the faults that you came into

 and when you ask

were did daddy go

i'll tell the truth

 i don't know

it's my mistake that no one wants us, but its not for all my wanting. To bring a face so smiling as to claim with meaning. This is what i want, you are my life, my family, my children, my wife. Its wrong that with all my questioning a being so known for wondering could ever make it right. Please forgive me all the hard life.  God I'm sorry guys.

 i guess sometimes one just shouldn't write...

Missing

i miss

someone to hold

to tell me it will be ok

and make the world go away

to give me love 

without end

my sweet friend

and a heart

so full of kindness

it bleeds for the world

and just being close

to feel

to hear

to know

the softness of truth

for I

am not a hard creature

I

am not one to be condemned

I should not be judged 

or directed

like water

please flow

deep

so deep

and unaffected by the rocky bottom

we are

only shallow water trips

i am never stagnant

because i am not my mind

or yours

i never can be

nor can you stay trapped

to flow is natural

to hold is divine

to feel is truth.

back

i remember

ties of peace

friends at ease

and now there's only war

disloyal to ourselves

keeping hearts that hide

fear of freedom to confide

serious smiles

so full of sadness

at the missing element

that once made us human

that once made us friends

we can never be in sunlight together again

driven apart by bodies

these souls on a journey

can the child's peace ever

reflect on our faces

will the path ever find us together

while running from choices

only

look
i know the every move

i've seen the contemplation

on a heart

heavy as the

winter snow on mountains

all around the land

of earth and fire

6 feet over

lyin

taking sides

under the false promise
of paradise

surrounded by anger

the source of change

there are no maps

in the mind we tread

but all

every

single

second

the sparks create

manifest a state

of life or desperation

is there a peaceful resolution

between children and toys

man and boys

woman and lies

what are relationships

besides ties that bind

keep us from the light

all we need is to realize

all this time

is only ours

all our problems

only ours

because we can't bare to be alone

with ourselves

i will learn

i am the resolution of me

i am the center of being

and so are you

understand there is no
separation from you and god

from kindness and fraud

i am my heart

open to hurt

left to damage

and blind in courage

not a thing

but a feeling

i and my mind

my organs, my skin

both outside and in

are living to live

and so are yours

i am love

lover and beloved

to me

all the world is my

hopeless hearts obsession

and i will give only joy that
returns from the universe

i feel and release the pain

i am not my reality

but i get lost in it's consciousness.

sweet words

only give titles

to the infinite

i vow to never capture

i vow to liberate

i vow to penetrate

i vow to attain

give life to the dead

and break those chains

with or without

no doubt

anger comes when someone
does it better

so don't compare

or you'll never escape

self induced hell

me 2

all i can do
is sleep
while your gone

my body's withdrawn
and my mind is tired

my heart is abstained

and the rush in my mind
has bowed down

to the voice in yours

fall is here

and soon all memories
of the ruin times

will wash me again

clean of worldly solutions

time

and the void of corruption

i let your misguided words
shape my truth

my absolute

was never you

but why then do i cry
in desperation

for some one to hold me

keep me from this helpless feeling
because i can't believe in

me

Sighs

am i really as severe
as your mouth
says i am

can we take back
all the bad
and all the games

all the self same
excuses

makes all the difference
in a failing case

every smile covers
a final plea

"but stone walls
do not a prison make

nor iron bars a cage"

i am free

in my mind

my soul
you'll never bind

cause you'll never find
me hidden
in the darkness
of a mind
untouched
by you

your lips
your shit

i am tired
of always feeling

something is missing
and i come to find
that little quiet one

is vacant me.
hiding behind hollow eyes

climbing over all the
junk inside.

piled high
there's not enough to
buy that
fills the space

left by my absent soul

but thank you
for my understanding

for my abandon

forgot myself

almost a decade
behind my own existence

thought i was a teardrop
'til i recognized the flood

...

i am

thankful

It was all

it was all I had
when u was it Wasn’t good enough
to be
and you said it wasn’t --


I HAD COME AND GONE
AND YOU ‘VE PAID HIM ,
YOU GAVE IT UP FOR ME
AND YOU HID HIM

I WAS ALL I FIND
WHEN YOU SAID
HE WASN’T ANYTIHNG TO ME
------

IT WAS ALL I’D DO TO REMEMBER
IT WAS evERYTHING I WAS
AND I
NEVER STOPPED IT

IT WAS ALL THAT TIME TO BE
AND HE WAS OLD ENOUGH FOR ME
SAID IT WAS GOOD ENOUGH FOR ME

NO NO NO YOU CAN’T SAVE A THING FROM ME

IN OUR LIBERTY

YOU’LL BE GOOD


CAUSE IT WAS BAD LIKE YOU
AND YOU R BAD LIKE ME
DON’T FOLLOW ME INTO THE DARK

CauSE I’M BAD LIKE YOU
AND YOUr BAD LIKE ME
OH DON’T WE GAIN IT BEFORE
WE START

OH BEFORE WE START

IT WASn't
LIKE I DIDN’T REMEMBER

BUT IT WASN’T ALL THAT I THOUGHT I HAD

AND EVERYTiME I TRIED TO KEEP HOLDING ON
IT FLYS
IT SLIPS AWAY
LIKE A SOAPY BUBBLE

THAT I CANNOT KEEP
ITS LIKE IT WAS NEVER MEaNT
FOR MY INTENT TO GET

BUT I THOUGHT THAT IF I’D HOLD IT AKL IN
THE MOMENT, MORE IT ‘ D SLIP AWAY
MORE IT’D SLIP AWAY

BUT I NEVER NEW THaT ITS WAS MEaNT FOR ME
BECAUSE ID ALWAYS SAID THAT IT WAS MEaNT TO BE FREE

BUT I CAME TO YOU,
KNOW your NEW WAY

CAUSE IT WAS BAD LIKE YOU
AND YOUR BAD LIKE ME

OH DON’T FOLLOW ME INTO THE DARK

J YOUR BAD LIkE YOU
AND I’M BAD LIKE ME
ITS OUR INDIVIDUAL TASTES
thAT MAKES US FREE


OKAY LET ME WORRY aBout A DAY
LIES EVERYDAY
AND YOUR JUST SOME PLAY
AND IT WAS NOT THAT I WOULD OWN YOU FOREVER
IN THIS WEB
IT KEEPS ON GOING
BUT ITS BETTER

IN I NEVER THOUGHT I WOULD TURN HER
BUT I GAVE LOVE EVERYDAY

AND I NEVER THOUGHT
THAT I WAS OFF TRACK
AND I NEVER THOUGHT

I’D FALL OUT Of CONTROL
FALL OUT OF CONTROL

CAUSE I ‘M BAD LIKE YOU
AND YOUR BAD LIKE ME
DON’T FOLLOW ME INTO THE DARK

BAD


--------

If you'd like to hear my recorded version check out my band:
http://www.myspace.com/castoffunerals

Love

what is love
the affinity of fields
the reuniting of
a
separate consciousness

if we all reflect the same
waves of feeling from the brain

projected through the
waves of being

should all the world love
destructively

or join together
in a chorus greater
than the dream of god

we are the flood
connected and frustrated
by our possessions possessing

loved is owned when love is known
but hushed it blossoms
never mentioned

the word

where is the end
for me
if there is a happiness
in the word
fulfilled
in the kiss
without words

like the first time
never replayed
cause we're already dead

i wanted
i lost it
your here
but I'm alone

cause you don't want it
anymore

guess i used up all my time
every try just makes it less

every smile
sits undressed

and it's never enough
to just feel good about yourself

i cry
and I'm here
but no one cares

It Is

its no wonder
we live in a world
of lies

no one can face
the truth
when its said

that thing
that we already know
when we are shown

truth
god
blindness

consuming souls
we turn our backs
on what we cant control

we've forgotten how to feel
we don't want to see whats real
because we can't

conditioned to love
what we confine
and damned to
reach for freedom

that can not be attained
as long as we lie
and believe

that it's something
to pursue
and not something
that is

Whatever you think
will make it right
will make it good
will make it anything

will make it lies
and your easy breezy
false face
will want

and will find
emptiness
with out
attainment

we should all
speak truth

there is no
right
there is no
light
there is no
space
theres just a face
an image
that we steal
for a short time

parasitic beings
of energy
possessing
a mind body

until we destroy
this immortal
creature

with our lies
trapped until
we open up to the
pain that comes
when the raw soul
is bare

naked and strewn
before the universe
crying "take me"

for i am perfect
in my imperfections

i am holy
in my mistakes

i was truth
to my world

for always

it’s not about the money
or the company
this life

its not about the friendship
or the fame
this name

you can run
not this time
not again
cause the rain will follow you

Til your done with
running
done with time

divine threads will bind
across space and
lifetimes.

i will find me
when the running ends
floating in stars
rippling dimensions
slipping through my fingers
like sand

the beach
and breasts for pillows
smiles continue
frozen in shutters
of memories

for always
but never the same
cause we have changed
i understand

it was always you
in me