Suite e

i talk of dreams

i talk of children

of an idle brain

begot of nothing but vain fantasy

if Shakespeare taught all we ever needed
to know of dreaming

where would we be each night

what a repetitive world

what a repetitive mind

believes all that needs

to be learned is only that

which breeds indifference

only that which comes from outside

where is the real?

undefined even by definition

inside

and out

the all permeating

instantaneous

we are the light

the node

the web

connectors of electricity in a dark
universe

here i see the shadows creeping

i know i saw a spider

i know a heard a cinder

but where have they gone

and why those i's

we're all a wave

an ocean

we rise and
we fall

we live and
we become nothing

the being is gone
and done

now where are we
what are we

no more then dispersed "should have" "could haves"

what the fuck are you doing feeling
the way you do now

why are you learning someone else's game

whose rules

whose money

whose mistakes

what is it you want so badly

why do you wake in the morning

perhaps its this mind that traps you
into an infinite world

finite by definition

which separates you from experience again

forget to run from what fights you

forget to breathe when it happens

fall back inside

to find me

well not me

but thats as close as you can get
to describing the indescribable

to conceptualizing and conceiving
of something so incredible

so fulfilling

it was missed

prepare yourself to let go of nothing

and engage the sexual writhing beneath
the surface of silky existence,

a shell to cover the soul, pounds of death
and water this vehicle surrounds

and here you experience the weight of your
own doings

so heres you moral

and what a life

for now

a thought

disturbed...

My Meez

Wicked Weekend

may all your fears
be satiated

and all you pleasures
meet

watch out for all your doing
leaving no room
for regret

before the end is written
and you sleeping soul
is wet

see nighttime full of
mocking mouths

gaping eyes which
cannot see

and the
cavern full of nothing

under which the mauling
feed

kiss this, fuck
regret is nothing

save your silent
revelries

enter now
into this morning

the one you lost...
is now at peace

happy Halloween
everybody

Touch

this is your center
i am your mind

leave behind
what you need

and touch with
pale fingers

where i think you
should be

ah the air
escapes your life

and wet and warm
in the beginning

let it stay in you
until the fondness
fades

until it fades
i'll stay

run backwards
over deadleaves

frozen cheeks
will mar the makeup

dare to touch
the numbness

and we will stay
until your color fades

until it fades
i'll stay

"No" Place

in a land made of mirror
i tread in soft slippers

over the invisible infinite surface

cover my mouth to
hide my shame

over and over
and over again

i don't complain
don't make a sound

the silvery silence is
defining

and when i end
i forget
to begin

entranced by my walking
my self is gone

looking for you
once frozen sun

in the horizon i see my face
illuminated solitude and grace

"someday" i sit and sigh
reflecting in space

happy 4th yall

If anything should happen in the big NY

if the world disappears, or just i do

I would like everyone to know

Happy independence day

Do it for you

accept the good with bad

swallow your ego

and allow yourself the freedom

entitled to a living being

and shout to the heavens

i am here and i will be happy

because i breathe,

because i see

i am and i experience

I love and i am life

don't react

allow and understand you
and every other being alive

lives and dies

so switch off the autopilot

jump headfirst into your biggest fears

because after that what's left

but to be the traveler
the navagator

the one who truely lived
and died

but still endures

to all of you

taking day by day

i love you

i will always love you

i respect you and i miss you

and most of all

now

right now

I am here with you
enjoying you

for who you really are
a living being

and thats enough for me

Humanity

in this world
of inconsistancy

i dance
like the small
flower

in a wake
of a mighty wind

wavering
secretly
i dream of a race
that knows
more of self
then i ever could

can't you see
in that light
through slanted eyes
that ancient need

only filled by your
self satisfaction

i was right

so long ago

standing alone

reflecting on a people

only gratified by pain

silence followed love
down the twisted halls

locker lined lessons
in social disfucntion

oh well

the illusions run
away with me again

i am possesed by possesions

wanted by lovers
and loved by none

i tread down
the shadowy tracks
of soul seclusion

playing a game
with myself
i walk through the
rain again

suffering incomparable
to starvation

i am tryly centered in
the wrong direction

counter-weighed by
hate

i rock above the waves
i see the sea of hands

there i confide
in unfamiliar eyes

'cause icons fall
but never die...

OK

moving forward
never ceasing
to amaze

minds a haze
my pillz
all.........
gone

forests forgotten
walking through
burnt remains

i am the one
captain of absence
passing by
the sun

after all
the dust has
settled on
the world

i have begun
to derail time

take it in
long lines
smiling at
the reflection

bleeding down on me
close my eyes to
see the future
erased

escaped
a life

who can say
it's ok

The World

here we are
at the beginning
and the end

now together
once apart
i self destruct
to find the center

cutting
red wine
lines across time

vertically i
consider
all i have remembered

and i travel down through time
progressing backwards

I make a space
a small black box

my knees tight
huddled up inside

feeling in
suspension

i can't escape this tension
so i sleep

until you come

all existence
dripping down
the arched
back of my skull

enough of tearing
love through rivers
shining faces

in the bathroom light
floor of the shower

weeping for the world

CANT BE SAVED - Senses Fail

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your hand

i stare
into the opened eyes
of blissfulness

escaping past
i look into lostless
uncertain

but alive

i find you also
breathing
sleeping

you animal man
won't pretend
to know you...

promise

to appreciate
to look forward to
to celebrate

run my nighttime lips
over your cool fingers

kiss the thin golden promise
and smell the sweet
cigarettes
still clinging to
your resting hand

love is this
smiling silence

keeping

im afraid

this decending spirit
trapped in the endless cycle

refuses to accept a fate unwanted

rather then spoil the party

finding earthly monotony
everywhere it should not be

whose to say whats happy

wishing everyone the best
she slips on a starlet dress
and asends the velvet steps
forever

sending all her best to
all those souls

entertaining mortals
momentary bliss

to impatient to even hide
followings another pointless high
it will all spill out with time

then she'll know she loved a lie

passing mind

why am I
not enough to satisfy

if i should struggle
to understand
you as i

then where do i defy?

falling short
of love

i try to know
but knowing only makes
the problem grow

falling further from
those holy dreams

so why
do i do this
to my mind...

Sweet

drip
drop
slowly
sliding down
like fingers

rich darkness
moving

softly into
silky porcelin

not a sound
save the haulted
breath
of
exhalation

in a kiss
lips movement
seeming motionless

theres nothing like
sweet
java bliss...